Why Do I Isolate Myself?

Hi guys! So, for those of you who don’t know, I’m still accepted submissions for questions to answer. Also, because lately, I notice I’ve been rather isolating myself, I wanted to get into the topic of why I do that..

So, I’m quite frankly somebody who does not take bad news well- who does? But when it comes to coping with such situations, I tend to isolate myself from other people. I draw in all of my pain towards myself- which can be seen as extremely self-destructive (and it is), and not many people really ever understand why.

The reason why I isolate myself is not because I don’t want the support. Because honestly, I do need the support more than anything and it’s the number one thing that I seriously want in desperate times. But there’s multiple factors that are involved.

One of them is that I have been hurt many times by people I thought I trusted. Every time I have tried to allow the majority of people into my life, I believe I’ve been turned away the times I did need somebody, whether they were busy or didn’t care or whatnot. So, I feel as if my problems will be better solved if I keep them to myself.

Another reason I isolate is because I don’t like to bother people with things that are upsetting me. It partially is because I believe that if somebody wants to fix something, they shouldn’t complain about it, and I do my absolute best to hold true to that very ideal. Plus, I just feel worse whenever I talk about my situations, because either the person pities me or tries to solve it and that’s the last thing I want.

The third reason is that chances are, the problem has been solved and I just needed to stew about the remains of it. It’s honestly a strange concept, but after I finish dealing with a situation, I find myself needing to share it as if it was still going on. Somehow, I think it makes it feel more valid and perhaps might make me feel stronger about solving it.

I’m not trying to push away or hurt other people. I isolate in desperate times because I don’t want to bother anybody. And so, I usually don’t.

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1 thought on “Why Do I Isolate Myself?”

  1. I do understand and appreciate your desire to isolate yourself, Ayla. Putting yourself out there to the world is not an easy thing for anyone. With that said, I do think doing so is worth the effort. I was a very shy child and teenager. My relatives were shocked when I hit my 20’s. I heard comments such as…oh my Lord, I didn’t know Gale could talk. I was very afraid of sharing my thoughts and ideas with people. So, things do change. I gained more courage and personal understanding. You need to be open to change. Hugs and heaps of love. Keep on writing! You are so good at putting words and thoughts together.

    Like

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